Musings and Reviews of Metaphysical, New Age and Meaningful Writings

Archive for the ‘Reading Recommendations available on Amazon’ Category

Stop Stressing Over Diets this Labor Day – Download this #FreeBook on Amazon


The Chakra Energy Diet coverKnowing which diet will work for you is just too much work – too much labor in my opinion. Paleo may work for some people, keto diets for some, anti-lectin or vegan for others – it all depends on your DNA, your constitution, medical condition and your belief system. I know, I’ve tried them all over the years.

Celebrate Labor Day by getting tips on how to stay in balance by adding color to your plate and your lifestyle – whether you’re an omnivore or vegetarian. This information and more is in THE CHAKRA ENERGY DIET, free for download on Amazon through Wednesday, September 5.

First of all, if you’re blaming yourself for not sticking to your “diet” or for not being your “perfect weight,” stop. It’s not your fault. Rather, the way our bodies are programmed to handle stress is the problem. Stress is a double whammy for weight – it increases our appetites and leads to overeating or poor food choices, then makes our bodies hold on to the fat. The solution is not extreme dieting, which causes more stress, but knowing how to stop the stress reactions.

STRESS, THE NOT-SO-SILENT SABOTEUR
The Chakra Energy Diet explains how stress affects weight both physiologically and psychologically. 

When you’re under stress, your digestion is impaired and you can’t receive the nourishment from the food you eat. Once the effects of adrenaline wear off, cortisol, known as the “stress hormone,” stimulates your appetite to replenish your food stores.

Excess cortisol also slows down your metabolism, because your body wants to maintain an adequate supply of glucose to deal with the next “threat.”

The disruption of cortisol secretion during the “fight or flight” response may not only lead to weight gain, but it can also put that weight exactly where you don’t want it – in your belly. Studies have shown that stress and elevated cortisol tend to cause fat deposits in the abdominal area, which is strongly related to Syndrome X, the cluster of risk factors associated with heart disease.

Screen Shot 2017-12-22 at 7.49.21 AMTake the quiz for each chakra in your FREE COPY of  THE CHAKRA ENERGY DIET, and learn exactly what you need to do to nourish yourself, banish stress, and help you achieve your optimal weight.

You’ll find out which of your chakras is under stress, and learn the best foods, relaxation techniques, yoga and exercise to balance your chakras and have a vibrant and healthy life.

Namaste!
Becca Chopra, author of The Chakra Diaries, Chakra Secrets, Balance Your Chakras-Balance Your Lifeand The Chakra Energy Diet

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ON THE EDGE #BookReview – A Lesson In Aloha – FREE for Download


 

ON THE EDGE Kindle CoverR. R. Harris is a witty wordsmith who weaves an evocative page-turner of mystery, adventure, and romance in ON THE EDGE: OF LAVA, LOVE AND TERROR.

Having lived through the lava scare on the Big Island, I can say this book totally captures the climate of that time. For those who don’t live in Hawaii, experience the suspense of living on the edge of an exploding volcano, multiplied by international terror and unrequited love.

But, there’s also inspiration to be gained, as an elderly Hawaiian County Councilwoman explains:

“Pele does not destroy, she creates, and what she creates is even greater than before, so maybe we needed a wake-up call to change our way of thinking. Maybe we needed to quit throwing around the word Aloha and then in the next breath curse our neighbor, or those who are different than us. Maybe we need to start living with Aloha, putting it into action and putting smiles on our faces. Maybe, Pele saw all of this need and was just helping us get started.”

ON THE EDGE is available FREE on Amazon Kindle through Sunday, August 5, and is also available in paperback.

Namaste!

Becca Chopra, author of The Chakra DiariesChakra SecretsBalance Your Chakras-Balance Your Lifeand The Chakra Energy Diet
www.theChakras.org

The Chakra Blog

Balancing the Root Chakra while enjoying DIGGING IN #Book Review


Screen Shot 2018-04-09 at 10.45.13 AMDigging In is an entertaining, engrossing and inspiring read. The protagonist, Paige, has just lost her husband in a horrific car accident, losing a perfect relationship, comfort and safety.

Now, her job is at risk also, she has a troubled teen, and is totally losing it until she starts digging in her backyard. The neighbors don’t like the big mess in a groomed lawn community. But with her Root Chakra totally unbalanced (loss of security), gardening is just what she needs. 

Author Loretta Nyhan expresses the emotions of grief in a profound way:

“Death was final, but grief wasn’t; it was a dirty street fighter who rose again and again even when I thought I had successfully knocked it to the ground. King of the sucker punches.”

While dealing with the death of her husband, the death of Paige’s boss (and his crazy son who has taken over the ad agency where she works) puts our heroine on the verge of losing her job of 17 years as well.

But learning to grow food from a new-found friend at the Farmer’s Market leads to new discoveries and lots of food for thought. She learns to tend fruits and vegetables and also how to better care for herself and move forward for both herself and her son, Trey:

“I’m learning. I’ve realized that’s what I should be doing at this stage in my life.”

It’s a fun ride seeing how something totally not in Paige’s nature helps her grow and succeed in all areas of her life.

Digging In is available now on Amazon.com.

Namaste!
Becca Chopra, author of The Chakra DiariesChakra SecretsBalance Your Chakras-Balance Your Lifeand The Chakra Energy Diet

www.theChakras.org

26 Ways to a Better Relationship: THE ABC’s OF LOVE #BookReview and #AuthorInterview


ABCs CoverReading The ABCs of Love may be the most loving thing you can do for yourself and your partner.

It supports you in transforming your relationship: if it’s already great, then it will help you make it even better, and if you’re stuck, or suffering, then it will be show you how to turn things around.

If you’re not as happy as you’d like to be in your relationship, you may think that you or your partner – or both – have fallen out of love. But this book shows you how, most likely, you’ve simply fallen into bad or just repetitive habits. And it provides advice on the new habits you can adopt to prevent relationship problems… savoring what’s good and fixing what’s not.

The first chapter in The ABC’s of Love is Attachment and the last is Zest, so you see where this is going and how many suggestions Diana Shulman offers to keep your motivation strong.

For example, what is your style of attachment? Are you, e.g., an Approacher or an Avoider? Knowing yourself and your partner’s styles of relating can help foster better relationships. Diana Shulman recommends celebrating our differences, developing compassion, patience and respect for each other… so you can live your life to its fullest.

Love

The chapters are short and full of inspiration, lessons, and entertaining and insightful examples from the author’s marriage in applying her own lessons and those culled from experts in couples counseling. 

Author Diana Shulman, J.D., Ph.D., is a psychoanalyst in Los Angeles with more than 25 years of clinical experience after practicing law for 10 years. Here, she answers my questions about The ABCs of Love:

INTERVIEW WITH AUTHOR DIANA SHULMAN:

Who can most benefit from reading The ABCs of Love?

The ABCs of Love is a self-help book for anyone in a relationship regardless of milestones, age, or sexual orientation. Readers will find everything they need — quite literally, from A to Z — to avoid the landmines, repair wounds (both old and new), rekindle desire, and get happy again. So whether you’re young or old, dating, or about to celebrate your 50th anniversary, the vignettes, tools, and skill-building exercises in the book can help readers create the relationship of their dreams.

What is the most effective way for the reader to use this book to improve their relationship?

I recommend couples read the book from beginning to end and then zero in on the chapters and exercises they found most helpful, keeping in mind there’s no such thing as perfect. Fights are normal. All couples fight, some more unproductively than others, of course, but we all fight. In fact, what distinguishes successful from unsuccessful couples is repair — the willingness to look, learn, and promise to do better. The ABCs of Love is all about how to do this.

I really like the TRY THIS feature at the end of each chapter. Do couples need to answer the questions together?

Couples don’t need to do the Try This exercises together but if they can put their heads and hearts together to discover ways to get things going in a better direction, it’s a real plus. Having said that, if one partner reads the book and starts making improvements, it’s going to help the relationship. As you might expect from.the title, the topics are presented in alphabetical order starting with “Attachment” and ending with “Zest.” 

In Chapter F for Feelings, you cover how we deal with emotions. What would you say is the best way to handle them?

Emotions are sometimes compared to ocean waves and for good reason. They’re natural and powerful as they reach a peak and flatten out with a noticeable ebb and flow. Letting emotional waves pass through you from beginning to end isn’t about losing your temper or non-stop weepiness. Instead, it’s about slowing down, mindfully noticing bodily sensations, perceptions, and impulses as the energy rises and falls. If you take the time to let a feeling do its thing, options open up, angles you’ve never considered enter your mind, and new strengths begin to emerge.

When handled effectively, our emotions are a vital part of an internal guidance system. They help make us better decision-makers. While all this sounds commonsensical, as though it should be effortless, most of us are afraid of certain emotions. We don’t want to explore their energy; we want to avoid it. It’s what we learned and what we’ve always done, but given the downside of turning away, I say it’s time to try something else. Many of the exercises in the book are designed to help couples do just that and start growing again.

Can you explain The S.U.R.E. Thing to lessen negativity in a relationship?

The S.U.R.E. Thing is an acronym I came up with to help couples slow down and think before lobbing the next conversational grenade. It’s about reminding yourself that your partner has an understandable point of view — even though you don’t agree with it. Here are the four steps of The S.U.R.E. Thing:

S is for Slowing your breathing to calm your brain so you can think more clearly.

U is for Understanding your partner’s points or feelings by focusing on what makes sense (you may not like what your partner is saying, but it still makes sense).

R is for Reflecting back what you heard to show you’re tuned in, “It makes sense to me that…”

E is for showing Empathy. “This has been difficult. I’ve made it worse, and I’m sorry.”

Witnessing each other is calming as opposed to infuriating. If you hold back on speaking until your partner shows signs of feeling heard, you’re in for a treat. By waiting your turn, you create a real chance of having an audience when you continue the conversation.

What overall message would you like readers to take away from The ABCs of Love?

I hope readers will see their recurring conflicts as a doorway into closeness and connection. Whether dramatic or born of something more routine, these are the moments, brief or drawn-out, when we feel dismissed, attacked, ignored, or shamed. Revisiting moments of disconnection and conflict can be a gift, a passageway into healing, provided we do it wisely — meaning explore what happened with an eye toward the future and the past, an ear for both words and feelings, and an ever-growing awareness of blind spots, hot buttons, and mistaken assumptions. If we fail to do this, the gift goes unopened and will soon be forgotten, ensuring more of that pointless back and forth we know all too well.

How can readers connect with you?

Readers can find me on Facebook at https://facebook.com/ABCsOfLove and at my website: www.dianashulman.com

The ABCs of Love is available at Amazon.com.

Namaste!
Becca Chopra, author of The Chakra DiariesChakra SecretsBalance Your Chakras-Balance Your Lifeand The Chakra Energy Diet

www.theChakras.org

 

 

 

Conquer Subconscious Fears Associated with Love – REDISCOVERING LOVE #BookReview and #AuthorInterview


Rediscover Love coverRediscovering Love: An Intimacy Restoration and Growth Journey Guide can help you identify how hidden fears and learned behaviors from as far back as childhood are undermining your relationships. Page after page, you’ll start to understand why your relationships have played out as they have, and how your subconscious can trick you into acting out of fear instead of love.

Reading this book has truly been an eye-opener, helping to set me on a path towards discovering and enriching my connections with both my self, my husband and my world.

Roy Rawers’ truly transformational lessons are packed with mindset-altering ideas and stories that follow the progress of three of his clients. One of his recommendations to them and to readers of Rediscovering Love is to cultivate inner clarity through journaling, so we can see how our thoughts and feelings activate one another in a less than loving way. Then he relates how to learn and practice new ways of thinking, feeling and relating, so that we can consistently hold thoughts of love toward our partners, and consistently express them.

By the time you’re done reading the book and answering the Self Help Exercises at the end of each chapter, you can’t help but feel your heart growing with love and compassion for yourself and your loved one.

“Sometimes as we rediscover love, we rediscover ourselves.” ~ Roy Rawers

Roy Rawers, MA, LMFT, CSAT, is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist with a Southern California private practice focused on working with individuals and couples longing for more satisfying relationships. In the following Author Interview, he discusses how his book offers real solutions for real people with busy lives who want to identify and heal their problems.

AUTHOR INTERVIEW WITH ROY RAWERS ON REDISCOVERING LOVE:

Who is this book written for?

In the introduction, I write that this book is “for all those who refuse to think the best days of their relationships are behind them and who have the courage and willingness to try to repair the relationship.” My original intent was focused on helping intimate partners stay or grow more connected, but what I’m learning from the feedback I’m getting from the readers has pleasantly surprised me. I’m hearing that not only are people using the book to help with their intimate partner relationships but also applying the principles with family members, significant friends, and co-workers. Usually unintended consequences don’t work out so favorably, but in this case, I’m happy to report positive results.

What would you most like readers to take away from Rediscovering Love?

I like to think that there are a few themes woven into fabric of the book that I hope stick with the reader:

a) The value of self-examination, introspection, and gaining insight into how one’s own unique experiences can influence both positively and negatively the quality of their relationships.

b) The reality that it can take a significant amount of emotional courage and energy to grow relationally, but I haven’t run into one yet that has said the reward wasn’t worth the effort.

c) Hope. Another quote from the book hits the center of this, “It doesn’t matter so much what cards we are dealt as much as it is to learn how to play them as best they can.” Meaning that no one is disqualified from participating in the journey, but some may have more challenges than others.  

What is the “Lover’s Dilemma?”

The “Lover’s Dilemma” is the tension between the desire to be and feel connected to another and the sacrifices or hardships that come with the relationship. A simple example might be when a husband chronically leaves his dirty clothes on the ground for his wife to pick up. It’s not a “deal-breaker” or true threat to the continuation of the relationship, but it’s annoying and creates an “emotional cost” to staying in the partnership. Annoying is nothing to ignore, but the tension can become more intense when issues of self worth, rejection, acceptance, abandonment, or inadequacy enter the relationship. All relationships experience the Lover’s Dilemma to some degree, what’s important to take way is understanding when, to what degree, and how one mal-adaptively reacts to emotional pain so that more effective problem solving processes can replace old responses.

How can one best handle unmet expectations in a relationship?

Every relationship will experience unmet expectations; how they are responded to is the key. Not to oversimplify the process, but I think the best defense is a good offense. When a couple can proactively work on developing their abilities to: 1) have early identification of both what is and isn’t working for them in their relationship; 2) the ability to appropriately communicate those issues within an atmosphere of emotional safety; and 3) avoid settling on solutions that are overly burdensome toward one side or that could create resentment over time.

When pro-actively addressing our life situations, it’s harder for small problems to grow into big ones.

How can we change unconscious habits that keep us from a loving relationship?

By being very intentional to do otherwise. Learning to anticipate situations when an old habit would occur, and intentionally replacing it with a new response, meaning purposefully and premeditatedly practicing an outcome different than the unconscious pattern. Many find it helpful to create a script of how they would ideally respond and mentally rehearse the new outcome in preparation of a real life opportunity to practice. Over time and with perseverance, the new pattern will begin to override the old programming.  

Why do you recommend journaling?

I could possibly write an entire new book on the value of journaling, but some of my favorite benefits are: 1) Learning things about yourself you would otherwise miss or deny; 2) Providing historical evidence of growth, and reflect on changes in attitudes or perspectives; 3) Capturing verbally unexpressed thoughts, feeling, and emotions that may be helpful to address vs. avoid; 4) It’s an emotional gym, a ritualized place to develop one’s intimacy with self and others.

What exactly is the new process of journaling recommended – the Captain and Terrorist method?

This is a new way at looking at an old problem, namely, how to examine and counter mal-adaptive internal dialog patterns.

Why do intelligent people sometime make terrible relational decisions? In most cases when we feel unsafe or unsure when faced with an emotionally threatening situation, the fear control center of our brain tries to take our decision making process away from the executive functioning part, the pre-frontal lobe. The Captain and the Terrorist represent the two forces battling inside one’s head for control over the prevailing narrative and how to respond to a threatening situation. By listening, or studying, the dialog that goes on between the fear based and rational/logical parts of our thoughts, it is possible to understand how our past traumatic experiences and perspectives are used by our fear-based side to promote choices that are relationally destructive. For example, a husband might conclude to not talk to his wife about something that is bothering him, because when he thinks about it, a fear-based narrative, such as, “she’ll only think I’m weak,” overrides an opportunity to be intimate through sharing his feelings.

There is an ancient Chinese saying that goes, “Know yourself and know your enemy and you need not worry in a hundred battles.” Certainly if one has a keen understanding of both their Captain and their Terrorist, the Captain will have an advantage in knowing the enemies strengths.

Why is it better to live in the gray zone than in strictly black and white?

Here’s what a relationship loses when we choose to think in black or white terms: 1) The desire, interest or ability to understanding another’s thoughts or feelings (loss of empathy); 2) Resilience and openness to criticism (loss of authentic self examination); 3) Meaning all is reduced to either “good” or “bad”, requiring a winner and a loser (loss of accurate discernment).

You might be able to see how the Lover’s Dilemma fits into this situation, as giving up the comfort and familiarity of a black and white perspective could easily require an unspecified amount of emotional turmoil. Living in the gray offers greater potential to attain deeper levels of intimacy, with oneself, and with others.

You say, “…as we rediscover love, we rediscover ourselves.” Can you explain that?

The best gift that I find my clients receive toward the later stages of rediscovering love is a clear and restored sense of “okay’ness” with oneself, despite being openly able to discuss their personal shortcomings. Not rationalizing or justifying the dysfunctional parts of themselves that could still benefit from ongoing work but understanding that they are lovable and acceptable while still having flaws and room for personal growth. For many, it will be the first time in their lives that they actually felt authentically “okay” about themselves.

Do both partners in a relationship need to follow the self-help tools you recommend in Rediscovering Love?

Let me start by saying that I don’t think you need to be in an intimate relationship to begin learning how to have more satisfying and connected relationships. The Rediscovering Love self-help tools can be very helpful for a single person looking to make sense of past relationships and what can be done to not repeat the process with a new face, or someone who has never been in a serious relationship but wants to gain an understanding of healthy intimate partner relationship dynamics.

For those in a relationship, one of the benefits of the self-help tools is that they don’t require a partner’s participation to be useful toward rediscovering love. Even less enthusiastic partners get an opportunity to develop their ability to rediscover love when their mate shares and demonstrates their own journey. While I never recommend taking responsibility for another’s intimacy development, being vulnerable and exposing one’s own journey can spark a partner’s interest in participating at greater levels, but don’t be surprised if their pace is slower than you would like it to be.

Rediscovering Love: An Intimacy Restoration and Growth Journey Guide is available on Amazon.

Roy Rawers’ insightful writing brings psychological practices into today’s world, to treat today’s unique problems. You can find more of his ideas on his blog at rawerstherapy.com.

Namaste!
Becca Chopra, author of The Chakra DiariesChakra SecretsBalance Your Chakras-Balance Your Lifeand The Chakra Energy Diet

www.theChakras.org

 

 

 

#FreeKindle of CHAKRA SECRETS – Learn #SelfLove and More


Chakra Secrets coverHappy Valentine’s Day! There’s no better way to share the spirit of LOVE than to share a tale encompassing all my actions and emotions in the relationships arena – good and bad  – with a happy ending and an instant healing technique everyone can use.

So, I invite you to download a copy of CHAKRA SECRETS, which is FREE on Amazon Kindle through Thursday, February 15.

Here’s a review of the book by a reader on Amazon:

 Chakra Balancing, Past Lives, Yoga and More!

“Began this book at Midnight, read straight through until 4 a.m. and waited until the light of day to review.

All of the cliches fit: cliff hanger, couldn’t put it down, fast-paced, brilliant writing…yes, all that with an important message: life is the same for everyone, we hurt, we grieve, we suffer, we have moments of joy and passion, and we are all subject to the same feelings.

We are born and re-born both physically, as in reincarnation, and spiritually, as in evolution of the soul…and there are very real modalities that we can employ to overcome our private agonies and move along our spiritual path to fuse with the light. That’s the simplistic version.

Author Becca Chopra put herself out on a limb with this autobiographical novel in which she introduces powerful, spiritual healing modalities in a very earthy way. She covers yogis gone wild, drugs, passion, longing, as she takes you on a breathless journey from actress to respected yoga teacher, an amazing roller coaster ride that introduces yoga, rainbow tantra, tantric gurus, macrobiotic diet, past life regression, acro-yoga, Ho’opono’pono and a very effective Huna Dynamind technique which can be practiced at home.

The storyline is complex yet unfolds simply and easily, propelling the reader right to the happy ending. And after all the twists and turns, one is certainly ready for that relaxing out breath and release.”

I look forward to sharing my story with YOU also – I invite you to download CHAKRA SECRETS.

Namaste!
Becca Chopra, author of The Chakra DiariesChakra SecretsBalance Your Chakras-Balance Your Lifeand The Chakra Energy Diet

www.theChakras.org

 

Want More Happiness and Abundance? Read HUMAN CONNECTION #BookReview and #AuthorInterview


Human ConnectionLaughing, Learning, Leading, Loving and Living Large all play a critical role in making our lives and personal relationships as good as they can be. Arthur F. Coombs’ delightful storytelling in HUMAN CONNECTION: How the “L” Do We Do That? is all about becoming the best “you” possible using these five tools.

Coombs is an excellent storyteller, weaving a very personal narrative with historical examples of how it takes connection with others to be happy and fulfilled. He takes us under his wing, and unabashedly shares the most poignant moments in his life, including both his failures and successes. He also includes motivational stories and quotes from his family and friends as well as famously wise men and women, from Gandhi and the Buddha, to Coco Chanel and Marianne Williamson.

Laughing is the first key to forming a solid connection with others and also “the only way to get through life…” quotes Coombs, adding “…laughter can kick off positive thoughts and feelings that lighten the mood and put things into perspective.” Coombs offers wonderful examples of how humor not only alleviates stress, but makes us feel good, and then he keeps us smiling and laughing throughout the book as he covers the other four L’s as well.

Whether you want to be a good Leader at work or at home, the capacity for Laughing, Learning, Loving and Living Large are all interconnected and Coombs deftly makes it all sound seamlessly doable, from loving ourselves, to unconditionally loving others.

Coombs family

 

Reading this book will inspire you to Live Large — abundantly, wholeheartedly, to the fullest — and also give you the tools to do so.

Arthur F. Coombs III is a best-selling author, speaker, leadership guru, and single father of four, who is known for his visionary and innovative practices. Here, he answers my questions on HUMAN CONNECTION: How the “L” Do We Do That?

What would you like readers to take away from reading your book?

If we want to have a meaningful impact on those closest to us, at home or in the office, we must genuinely connect with them…in person. Not just through email, texting, or social media sites.

Technology has made our lives easier in many ways, but when it comes to human connection, nothing beats doing life together in real time.

Yes, life in community gets messy. We hurt other people’s feelings. We get our feelings hurt. We disagree. We argue. We sometimes say and do things we regret.

But when we continue to try, when we make connections and develop deeper relationships, we grow exponentially. We learn about the world around us. We bond with others. We heal. We mature. We become better versions of ourselves.

Why is connecting with others in person so important?

With genuine human connection, you can have more profound, more fulfilling relationships if you focus on five L’s: Living, Laughing, Learning, Leading, and Loving.

Living: Making an effort to be physically present, to interact and share with others on a regular basis is a critical step.

Laughing: Laughter is a beautiful and healing expression of joy. Whether you are 2 months or 102 years old, laughing is how we communicate: “I want to know you. I feel safe with you. I trust you. I feel connected to you.”

Learning: Being open-minded and willing to listen to another’s point of view or feelings without necessarily accepting them is a gift to both people. Connection demands that you are eager to teach and be taught.

Leading: If you want to lead others well in any capacity, you must first care about them. Whether you are leading or being led, true human connection is vital.

Loving: Love has many languages, takes many actions, and has endless forms of expression. Learn what moves you and perhaps more importantly what moves those you care about. Choose mercy. Choose compassion. Choose forgiveness. Choose each day to be genuinely kind.

We were not created to live and work alone. Authentic human connection is everything. And it begins with you. Without genuine human-to-human connection, you will never live the rich, wholehearted life you were meant to live.

In your book, you explain how we “Create Our Own World.” Can you provide a little insight into that concept here?

It sounds so cliché, but you truly are the masters of your own destiny.  It seems we all commit to ourselves to improve and yet most will admit they are not living the life they truly want. How many times have you made the same commitment to change for the better only to see it die a quick death? Many make promises to lose weight, stop smoking, start their own business, eat healthier, exercise regularly, be a better parent… you get it. I applaud the verbal affirmation. It is a start. However, there are no quick fixes, magic pills, or secret shortcuts. Real transformational work is hard, exhausting, and will involve sacrifice and uncomfortable choices. Two cues:

1: Break the goal down into small, doable, daily tasks. Instead of the abstract goal of “losing weight,” commit to specific small actions you can do every day that will propel you towards your overall goal.

2: When you stumble on your small committed action (it will happen), no sweat! Just get back to it tomorrow. Recognize that stumbling and getting back up is part of the process.

You are the source of your fortunes. Your dream is clearest to you and you alone. Let the dream drive sustained action. You have a fresh 24 today. What will you do with them? What world will you create?

What is a “Story Holder” and why do you think it is so important to be one?

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” – Albert Einstein

Just like those tree-climbing fish, society often tells us that we are not enough. We are not smart enough. We are not tall enough. We are not pretty enough, thin enough, fast enough, strong enough. Enough, enough, ENOUGH! When we pile on our own negative perceptions and feelings for others on top of what society tells us, we are creating a self-fulfilling prophecy that will most definitely come to pass.

You must bask in the light of others and allow them to share from time to time. You must give them the emotional space and comfort that allows them to drop their mask and talk to you. You must listen to your friends’ stories and savor and celebrate their authenticity and empathize with their pain. Hold their stories with reverence. Let your friends know you can be trusted and are worthy of hearing their stories. And when appropriate, laugh with them. Let them feel they are enough. Let them feel your trust, loyalty, and love.

You quote Brené Brown saying “…we can only love others as much as we love ourselves.” How does one truly love themselves?

 There are many things I do that promote healthy self-love. I sing and dance in the kitchen making my kids cringe and laugh all at the same time. I laugh at my mistakes. I make many. But the quickest and easiest tip I can give anyone that is struggling with self-love is to do a random act of kindness for another.

My natural reaction to stress, depression and my own selfish funk is to turn inward and shut myself off; I want to stay focused on my burdensome to-do list, and I want to be left alone. But then the lyrics of the song “Have I Done Any Good” by Will L. Thompson start dancing through my head, and I remember that the fastest antidote for self-loathing, discouragement and depression is to do something for someone else. I promise it truly works. I’ve tried it over and over, and it has been a foolproof method for creating healthy self-love, optimism, and cheerfulness.

How would you define true or real love?

The best definition I can give you for true love is “Love is wanting the happiness of another with no ulterior motives.” It is that simple. Hard to do, but that simple.

What is the secret to Living Large, as you describe a genuinely fulfilled life?

Do not let your past enslave or define you. Do not worry about the things you cannot control. Embrace and even encourage honest mistakes. Happiness is a choice, and anger, resentment, and jealousy are as well. Choose wisely. It is yours and yours alone to make. Your reputation means little; what other people think of you is not nearly as important as what you think of you. People and organizations who use shame, guilt, and judgment to create fear, intimidation, and control are not worth my time and energy. No matter how hard I try to please, plenty of people are not going to love me. There are only two things that are truly important to me — my time and my relationships. I protect closely what I do with my time and who I do it with.

Human Connection: How the “L” Do We Do That? is available on Amazon. Learn more at www.ArtCoombs.com.

Namaste!
Becca Chopra, author of The Chakra DiariesChakra SecretsBalance Your Chakras-Balance Your Lifeand The Chakra Energy Diet

www.theChakras.org

 

 

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